Skull fuck Muni? Skull Fuck teachers who bring their field-trips on Muni.

How can somebody responsible for educating our youth be so fucking retarded? What the fuck are you thinking, taking 30 loud little nose-picking walking shit-stains on Muni? I thought teachers were supposed to be smart. If you don't have enough chaperones to transport the little fuckers by car, then you don't have enough chaperones to make sure one of them doesn't end up at the bottom of the bay. Consider this a warning and a promise. Next time you bring your "little bumblebees," or whatever gay little nickname you've given your 3rd grade class, on Muni I'm going to abduct one of the bastards and murder the shit out of em.

The Examiner- Know a pregnant smoker who's planning to quit the instant she gives birth? Speed-dial her and say, "Not soon enough!" A study of 8- to 16-year-olds shows that kids exposed to smoke in the womb are six times more likely to have asthma than children of nonsmokers. And smoking is now tied to between 5 percent and 8 percent of premature births.
If you didn't quit before you were pregnant, don't waste energy feeling guilty. Quit now!!! And don't let anyone smoke near you or your kids. Just so you're clear, here are the dangers of secondhand smoke: New research shows that 23 percent to 34 percent of deaths caused by Sudden Infant Death Syndrome could have been prevented if the mothers had quit. Kids inhaling secondhand smoke are more vulnerable to lung and ear infections; school-age children have more behavior problems; and those with asthma are twice as likely to miss school.

What is this, 1950? How the fuck do you not already know that smoking 'cancer sticks' is bad for your baby? The idea that smoking is bad for you and anything around you is older than me. What's worse than smoking while you've got a bun in the oven, is contributing to the gene pool while being retarded enough to not know that pregos shouldn't smoke. Here's a fucking idea. Don't bother trying to quit smoking. Do yourself, your bouncing bundle of cancer, and the rest of mankind a favor and throw yourself off the Golden Gate Bridge.

Happy 4th of July